Cranford-A-Long

I am hosting a Cranford Mitt-a-long on Ravelry. Hoorah! The Cranford Mitts were one of the first p/hop patterns and have now been knitted almost 500 times.

The more the merrier so come along to Ravelry and join in! 

Craft Catch Up

Iza bin busy.

Pooch was very much your Star Wars aficionado. He had an impressive knowledge of the planets, species, languages, abilities and so on of the characters. Therefore when I left him one of the things I told myself was that never again would I watch any of the films or use any Star Wars references. Oh how naive was I? It is impossible to go for more than a few days without someone quoting from it somehow (just today CM Punk - yeah you know who I mean - said he would only respond to tweets that were star wars links and within seconds had 100's of "it's a trap" replies) and so I have given in and just now, when thinking of how to start this entry, found myself thinking in a Jar Jar Binks voice. The shame.

But I have been busy so enough beating myself over the head with an R2D2 plushy. I actually made some of this stuff quite a while ago but other stuff like, oh yeah, getting divorced, interrupted me from posting it.

I made a series of these back in july - because who doesn't make xmas decos in a heatwave? I got the idea from Pinterest and had a rummage in the bargain bin of a second-hand place on Charing Cross Road. Cue a copy of Adam Bede with half a cover that no one was ever going to love again.

Normally nothing would persuade me to take scissors to book but as it was already beyond repair...and they do look rather sweet. Tutorial here.

When I did my Make Lounge workshop I bought a lampshade kit in the shop. You can do a workshop on how to make them which I assume is a bit more complicated than "open kit, assemble" but I figured the kit was enough for me and at Festival of Quilts I found the perfect fabric.

Here it is in detail:

I am thinking of getting some more and making a skirt. Of course that would involve me remembering which stand it was from. Er....

While coughing it out on the sofa the last few days I've managed to start and finish a christmas present which I can't blog, and also tried out the Kanzashi maker I got at the weekend. Let me say immediately that in no way does this gadget replace Sister Diane's book, which is awesome. But it does make the whole thing amazingly simple if you just want to produce one size, one shape petals out of thin cotton.

I made the two murky green ones on the right of the picture in about 40 mins including cutting out the fabric. I am going to add buttons to the centres and then glue them back to back with a loop of ribbon in between as a xmas deco (murky green fabric has gold holly pattern printed on it).

Keeping with the 'glue' theme I have had the fabric cut out and half assembled for another metal frame bag (such as I made at Make Lounge) since the day after the workshop. Thing is, it was a frame I had had for ages and been meaning to try and it wasn't the same shape/size as the ones I had patterns for and so...well...all I'll say is it's best not to use a fabric with a horizontal stripe on a first solo attempt.

Tad wonky. Not to be put off though this frame was a doubler and so I now have a purse within a bag resting on my dinky dining table as the glue dries.

Well what other lining fabric was I going to have used? Just need to decide on the handle/strap.

I find being ill very frustrating as it means I suddenly have the time to do extra crafting but the inclination and necessary brain power are inevitably missing. I've ended up working to near completion on my ripple blanket, which now resembles a toxic rainbow double bed-spread.

It is now just 4 rows and a tidy-up away from being finished. Having had a temperature though it wasn't great having the blanket on my lap as I hooked so I looked for a knit project to get on with. Alas - brain could not come to any conclusion and it is only now as I have started to feel slightly more human that I have decided on the fall-away cardigan although I am no nearer deciding whether to go for dark brown alpaca from a past SkipNorth swap or purple wool from a distant trip to France.

Being ill and living alone without even a cat called Smackdown is a recipe for loneliness. The only person I spoke to yesterday was the plumber who called in to give a quote for a new shower (the previous one having exploded the week after the washing machine flooded the kitchen but the week before the hoover caught fire). We had met once before when he isolated the exploding shower so I could turn the water back on. 

"Hello" he said. 

"Hello" I said. 

"I can't kiss you because I've got a cold" he explained. 

"Fair enough" I replied. 

Oooo, it's just started raining. Got to go....

Almost Quilted Out

If you sew then Festival of Quilts ought to be on your 'must see' list each year. This was my third visit (last year is here on this blog) and I think it was bigger than ever, regardless of the recession.

The Quilts were once again extraordinary and I took a tonne of photos, all of which are on Flickr here. The ones in this post are just highlights. As usual there were categories and winners and commendations in each category. What always surprises me is the ones that don't win an award. This for example.

It's about double bedsized and made entirely from hexagons in black and white novelty fabrics.

And that didn't win an award? Amazing. There were hundreds of quilts and hundreds of stands and I was with Mater which made it all the better as I always prefer having someone to share things with. She is not keen on photos so here is a rare reverse shot.

You can see where I get the hair from although she is only about 5'2". As Mum remarked several times, it was very busy and you couldn't help bumping in to people but everyone was just so polite. There was a real ambience in the hall at the NEC because everyone was pleased to be there and knew that they shared their interest with everyone else. Bumping elbows with someone you apologise only for the other woman to say "Don't worry - wonderful isn't it?" with a huge grin on her face.

Union Jacks proliferated but it was a number of the small quilts - 12"x12", circles from quilting groups around the world, or the actual 'miniature quilts' section which really caught my eye.

The stripes in this one are each about 2mm across. The whole thing was about 14" square.

I came away with some lovely fabrics....

Plus some goodies. The Kanzashi tool is one I have seen Sister Diane use and I thought I'd have a play.

Then lastly I brought home this little guy who is less than 2cm tall.

 

Got to love a chinese china chicken. 

Good blog comments are hard to come by

I got some humdingers to my last post though. I therefore declare the first round of Lixie Hug Awards open.

Virtual hugs are going to...

• Doodles
• Amy
• Sal
• Purlpower
• Ynot
• Melissa

You've all taken the time to comment and it really has helped. Thanks xx

I am angry

I have been feeling angry since I wrote the divorce statement last week.

It's not fading away. If anything I am more angry now. 

I am aware that it also has something to do with PMT but I do feel pretty ill used at the moment. 

Writing the statement made it obvious how many chances there had been for it to be ok. I gave Pooch a second chance and he cocked up again. I said if he gave up drinking we could try again but he wouldn't consider it. Then I think about what we had planned and even though it never existed I feel like I've lost that too. The flat we had just saved enough deposit for, the cat that comes with owning your own place and not being dependant on the whims of a landlord. The shared living expenses meaning I had so much more disposable income, the child we had already started trying for. The hugs, the shared experiences, the friendship. All gone. 

I really hate dating. I hate the meat market aspect of it. But then I also hate being single. I want someone to share things with. I don't find dating exciting or liberating. I find it tedious and boring. So this also makes me feel angry. 

The final thing making me angry is that I am 99% sure that living your life believing in pay-it-forward is bollocks. I give up my seat on the tube, I hold doors open, I say 'hello', I unjam the printer, I am willing to talk things through and listen, I do favours, I share food, I give to charity, I offer help, I act as intermediary and I even lend money when asked to. I do all this without asking for anything in return because I have up until now believed that it encourages others to be the same with other people.

All it does is lead to me being treated like I'm stupid or soft or don't matter. People don't say thank you because they assume I will help them. "Alex will know" becomes a motto at work while others snigger behind my back.

The thing that worries me about this anger is that I am not sure how to express it. I feel that I can't because it's not socially acceptable but at the same time suppressing feelings is a really great way to send myself cuckoo again.

I wish there were a real Fight Club. 

I Owe Crazy Aunt Purl an Apology

When I first started blogging one of my favourites was Crazy Aunt Purl.

She is still utterly awesome and I just read her recent post on online dating and point four in particular:

4. It's actually much more fun to go shopping at Amazon or Zappos or Etsy because you find something you like, you give it your address and it shows up and doesn't try to murder you or tell you you're fat. No wonder online shopping feels so good. It's practically therapeutic.

She got divorced after her husband said he needed to 'find himself'. She did a lot of drinking during it all. She beats me though by having had three cats (now sadly just two) to help her through.

At the time I thought she was occasionally being a bit self-indulgant with some of her from-the-heart posts. I now wish to withdraw all such thoughts unreservedly.

On Thursday night I finally wrote the statement for the divorce papers. They are now in the post in duplicate with the marriage certificate and cheque for £340 for the court fees - which is more than it cost to get married in the first place. While writing the statement I was, I estimate, the third most upset I have ever been in my life (while sane). It was only just less upsetting than realising the marriage had ended in the first place. For about two hours I bawled as only a toddler denied sweets or a dumped teenager usually does. By the time I had stopped I looked like Shrek but on the plus side and half a bottle of Tia Maria later I didn't care anymore. Yesterday was spent wincing at daylight, noise and life in general until about 4pm when the pain lifted and I was whole again.

So that's done. I don't kid myself that those were the last tears but it will apparently take about 3 months to get a court date so I have a slight reprieve til then.

It seems like a good time to take stock so I am going to have a bit of a tidy up at the flat and also get the stash out. You always read stats about how we only wear a small percentage of our clothes because we forget we own the others because they are not stored properly. (At least, I seem to read that kind of thing quite often - it might just be me.) I strongly believe it is the same with stash. Part of the reason for reckless stash acquisition is not realising what you have and not thinking sensibly about how you will use it. For instance, I have enough sock yarn for about 50 pairs.

I *think* that might be enough. 

(Updated 9th Sept) Lixie's Adventures with Gentlemen Chapter 4 in which Lixie uses swear words

(Update at end of post)

I am a shit magnet.

Let me explain....the most recent adventures have been someone I met through someone else, not through the godawful matchaffinity. We were emailing back and forth for two weeks and then went on a first date on Thursday.

Two hours of chat and a bit of kissing. Nice.

Emails restart the following day. Mid afternoon he suggests meeting up that evening as well. I had an evening of pinboard activity planned (actually pinboard, not pinterest) but I decided to forego it and meet him again.

Pimms at the Tate Modern Bar where we both decided there was too much traffic for snogging and so went to sit on the grass outside.

THREE HOURS later he walks me to the tube with me sporting the latest in teenage accessories.

As we're walking I'm saying that one of the reasons I hate dating is because you have to have these conversations about exclusivity. "Is that a second date conversation?" he asks. Fortunately undeterred I continue at which point he says (and to be fair I may be paraphrasing) "Actually I'm kind of already seeing someone but it's ok because it's waning. I didn't tell you because I wanted to see what you were like before I did anything else."

Before concluding that the man is at best amazingly naive and at worst a cheating weasel, let's review the evidence.

1. I had already asked him in an email whether he was a cheating weasel (exact words used) because I hold views on such things. 
2. We had been emailing for two weeks with the stated intention of eventually going on a date, during which time he was presumably in an un-waning relationship with this other woman. 
3. I had been 100% upfront about both the divorce and the depression.
4. During early emails we had discussed our approaches to relationships and I had described mine as 'open and honest'. 
5. He didn't volunteer this information to me until I asked him directly, and initially tried to avoid the question. 
6. He has a "try before you buy" philosophy.
7. He's given me a fucking glow-in-the-dark hicky. 

Conclusion?

9th September Update
Since the episode related above happened I have ended up getting to know the man involved rather better. We've actually become pretty good friends. I have therefore had a chance to revise the impression I had of him and would like to issue the following correction:

1. He did not set out to decieve.
2. He is not a try-before-you-buy kinda guy.
3. He is therefore possibly not anymore weasel-like than the rest.

I suppose we've all met people who seemed really nice at first only to turn out to be utter bastards. This is a rare case of the opposite being true. It almost makes me think there is some point going back to dating. Almost. 
9th September Update 2

Ok ok geez. And I gave him 2 hickeys. BUT they were barely discernable.

Crafty Shortlist

I'm in a bit of a home building phase. It's certainly not for any broody reason since I am the most single of the singles, but more to make the flat feel properly like home. The wail of renters everywhere - there's not much I can do to alter the colours, layout, shelving etc but there are little things.

I've always liked mobiles and have been thinking of a cloud one for a while.

Source: etsy.com via Alex on Pinterest

I'd also like to add some hot air balloons.

Source: etsy.com via Alex on Pinterest

I've also been thinking about bunting or something like that. I made some for people at xmas.

But I've been thinking about some of this kind of one instead. Not really sure.

Source: ontobaby.com via Alex on Pinterest

Then maybe some things on the windows.

Source: cfabbridesigns.com via Alex on Pinterest

Hearts are a bit twee though. Maybe hot air balloons? Or clouds. On a bit of a cloud bender at the moment.

My hexagon patchwork duvet top nears completion so that will brighten up the bedroom, along with my newly painted fire engine red bedside cabinet. If I had my own place I'd love it to be something like this:

Source: sweethomestyle.tumblr.com via Alex on Pinterest

Lots of white but with colourful highlights. With one wall covered in corkboards...

Source: jordanferney.blogspot.com via Alex on Pinterest

Maybe one corkboard would be feasible even now....excuse me, must look at how much they are....

Friends are Awesome

I met up with two very different friends yesterday. One at lunch and one after work. In fact they couldn't really be more different, but they are both awesome, in equally different ways. With friendships you get out what you put in. Awesome.

In other news...

While friends are awesome, so are vintage up-ear clip-on earrings. This is my second pair. The etsy seller actually emailed me when she got them in her shop to tell me because she knew how much I loved my first pair. I was wearing the first pair today. Typical office wear, obviously.

Slightly less awesome are awesome hairslides you decorate yourself that then break after your first use.

It might be salvageable for something I guess.

Still fairly awesome is the patchwork quilt I started around Easter 2010 when I was still happily married, living a life of relative financial ease and thinking about babies.

It's not exactly progressing quickly but I'll damn well love it when I'm done.

And lastly, awesome are the larger patchwork pieces I am making for my lampshade.

All those different polka dots! Makes me so happy.

Raising the Knit Signal

Raising the Knit Signal

The link above is to a post on the P/hop website about the crisis in Somalia. I donated today.

The Knit Signal was first raised by YarnHarlot when the Haiti earthquake happened. Please think about your yarn budget for this month and whether you really need any more wool when there are so many people dying.