What Difference Does a Day Make?

When I woke up this morning the first thing I thought about was the wedding I am going to today and how the bride will feel when she wakes up this morning.

It's the first wedding I've been to since my own marriage ended. So I've been lying in bed thinking about my own wedding day and I realised it no longer makes me feel unhappy. There is still sadness and regret and a sense of loss - but things have moved on now. It has made me think again though about why people get married and whether I would ever consider it again.

The couple getting married today have already been together more than ten years and are very good together. I think they'll be very happy.

When I got married it was with a view to providing a stable, secure, legally supported environment within which to have a family. People asked me whether it felt different after marriage and I always said that it was very different because when you had an argument or hit a rough patch it didn't really matter because you were tied to each other and even though you might fall out you knew that it was temporary compared with the strong bond of marriage. It made me feel very safe.

Now that I know better, would I ever get married again? I guess the thing is that I don't need to think about it. My momentous decision yesterday which released the DB Aran lasted all of about 10 minutes when I decided to knit my cabled jumper in a different yarn all together. I still don't want the Sylvi but the outcome of that decision has changed.  

So it only remains for me to wish Steve and Rebecca the very best of luck. I am sure today will be wonderful and I am honoured to be asked to be a part of it.

Clarifications

1. From yesterday's post - Robbie Williams' nob is relevant because I was thinking about what I wanted. I do occasionally want thing non-craft related. Although I could still get creative with Robbie Williams. 
2. From three posts ago - mention of the 'lover' was serious. His name is Flash. He is actually rather lovely. I am rapidly thinking of him as a 'boyfriend' and he will be at the wedding today since it was the groom who introduced us. Persephone left a lovely comment on that post which I really appreciated. She's got her hands more than full at the moment so taking the time to share with me meant a lot.

Holy Mother Funkin Momentous Decision

I had a ticket for Ally Pally today and I'm not there. That is not the momentous decision. My throat infection got the better of me so I'm in my pyjamas eating pic'n'mix - but that's not really relevant.

I was thinking that had I gone I would have had a budget of £50. So now I could spend that online on something knitlike instead. So I started thinking about what I wanted.

I have been meaning to do a cable-heavy cardi for winter for a while and so thought some worsted/aran would be good. But something soft and squishy - not acrylic. I thought of the Debbie Bliss Aran I've had in my stash for several years now but then thought of the Sylvi I'd told myself I was going to make with it. Oh yes, I thought. The Sylvi, I thought.

This is when it happened...

I DO NOT WANT TO KNIT A SYLVI!

Ha! In your face world. Take that. Decision made, yarn released, let the cable pattern hunting commence. WOO HAAA!

Falling into Winter Swap

Sign-ups are open over on Ravelry.

I do love a good swap. This one is UK only which makes it easier on the postage.

Sign ups are open until Saturday 15th.

One year on

Let's play a game. Complete the following sentence "A year ago today I was...."

Well a year ago today I'd just left my husband and started on a course that would leave me as I am now - 2 weeks away from a decree nisi.

I wasn't sure how I was going to feel about it all. I had half expected to be really upset. But then...I'm not sure if time heals all but at least the wounds aren't so raw. Things have been going pretty well recently. Work is ok,  mentally I'm stable, I'm ok financially, there's a cat in my near future, I've just been on a gorgeous holiday, knitting and making in general is all good, my family is well and happy, and, to be honest, I've spent the weekend in the arms of my new lover*.

It's not that I don't wish things had turned out differently. Had things continued to plan I'd have a baby by now and be sitting in a flat I part owned with my husband. And I really did love Pooch so very much. If he hadn't acted as he did...but then I've thought that a lot during the last twelve months and the only response is to point out that he did.

And so looking forward...the cat blanket nears completion ready for the arrival of Smackdown.

I spent this afternoon is the company of the delightful Romford Knitters with the amazingly talented Nickerjac among others. Not content with mastering knitting, crochet, spinning and double fillet crochet to an exquisite level she has conquered jewellery and brought along the most amazing samples for our feedback. These two came away with me.

I absolutely adore them. Like orbits around a far off sun.

And even with little planets. I can't stop looking at them!

* His name is Flash and he is a juxtaposition on legs.